Admiring Authenticity (Pt. 1)

The celebrities I often admire are ones who admit their own struggles and share their pain for the public eye to see; a kind of vulnerability that takes gumption. I want to be that brave and honest as those individuals. I’m not suggesting that everyone has to pour their deepest or darkest secrets out. I know that cannot be easy, especially as a famous person. The media and the culture of tabloid scandals are overwhelmingly intrusive. What I do want to highlight is that people should feel encouraged to act authentically and speak about things that they do feel comfortable sharing; offering their viewpoint as close to what feels truest for them. Even us common people tend to hide behind an image that we think we want people to see or what will give us the most favorable attention. 

Why do we seek any kind of attention? Do we confuse it too often with validation? I believe the driving force of wanting attention is from the lack of validation that we are in fact seeking. Society profits off of our insecurities by monetizing a very defined, unattainable, and extremely unrealistic (often beauty) standard. If you look through time or even compare other cultures, standards have shifted or evolved; but they are still constructed to manipulate, control, and dictate the way the masses behave. When we let society tell us who to be or how to look, we remove our autonomy and lessen our self-esteem. As a whole, capitalist societies have created social media platforms that use algorithms to keep enslaving people’s minds into various idealistic standards. Which means when we like a post, share, comment, or provide reactions, we are feeding into that cesspool and endangering our own existence by often not validating ourselves, but society. On the other hand, we can also use these platforms and the internet as a whole to our advantage, if we actively choose positive messages to reinforce a better outlook for our self-esteem. If we can’t “beat” the game, we can at least change how it is played. By being more conscious about what messages are being received and told, we hold everyone accountable for creating a safer, kinder, and accepting space.

Is it in our nature to create an ideal and then to promote that to others? Sure, that’s what I’m doing here by sharing my posts. What’s important is this: No matter what ideal you consciously or subconsciously hope to achieve or want upheld, does not mean that it is then what others want. It is okay to impart our values and views to others. But it cannot be an expectation to make other’s change their personhood, just to align or fit into what we hope for them. This is a good reminder for parents as well. Your child will grow up to be many things, much will be because of your influence. But children will also grow into their own wonderful identity away from what you created. And it is in everyone’s best interest that we let people become whoever they feel they are, not what we have perceived what they are. We all have an obligation to give everyone a welcoming community that considers everyone’s appearances, ideals, and identities. It is in our power to own our differences and to embrace them; it is what makes us unique and special to those we love.